The biggest social problem of a digital nomad is the actual nomading part: being on the move full time, makes any relationship difficult. And when it comes to love, things become really complicated. Remote relationships are definitely not easy to maintain, but with commitment you can make it work. The extra distance between the two of you is going to be a lot bigger than a regular long-distance relationship: you might be working as a digital nomad in Asia, while your partner is stuck in North America.
It’s not going to be easy, but you can make a long distance relationship work, if you are serious about it.
Before we start this list of advice, we need to set one thing clear: in order to make your long-distance relationship work see the distance as an opportunity, not an obstacle. Think of how many people are alone in a couple, living alone close together – this is a very familiar situation for many of us. Instead of being physically close, but spiritually miles apart, it’s best to be physically apart and closely bonded by a strong, long lasting love.
If you see the distance between you and your partner as an opportunity, you will be able to test your love and see if you can really build something together. After all, if long distance can’t break a couple, nothing will!
And now, let’s check some valuable secrets on how to make remote relationships work.
Don’t become a sticky lover
When touching your partner is not possible and your face time is really limited, you might be tempted to be too sticky. The small details like walking hand in hand, eating at the same table and just being around your loved one are not possible, but don’t try to compensate by trying to keep in touch non-stop.
By trying to be in touch with your partner 12 hours a day you will only manage to get tired and suffocate the other one. Keep in mind that less is more in a long distance relationship, so communicate often, but not too often. Being 24/7 on the chat is not productive and can easily kill a relationship.
Set the rules before you leave
Before you leave to become a digital nomad you have to talk to your partner and find a common ground regarding your relationship expectations. Discuss what you expect from this relationship and how can you fulfill these expectations. Even if you might not like the responses, do talk about your relationship: is your partner going to date other persons? Are you going to date others? Be sincere and open up on these important things, so you know what to expect.
Communicate with your lover
Do communicate with your lover on regular basis, but without becoming too clingy. Exchange morning greetings, photos and videos and be spontaneous. Make the other person feel loved, even if you are not there to kiss her or him.
Get a good messenger app to help you stay in touch: you need an app which uses more than text to send messages. You have to be able to send emoticons, audio files, video and photo files, which can enhance your communication and really show how you feel.
The regular social media platforms are also very useful to make remote relationships work. Tag each others in photos, tweet and do some light stalking on each other – between lovers, these are not creepy, as long as none of you crosses the line. Social media can easily become a reason to argue about, so make sure you use it in a positive, effective way for your relationship.
Video calls are a must! They allow you to have some face time, so make sure you make a rule of video meetings. This is when you can share the latest gossip about friends and family and all the little things which happen to each one of you. Talk about anything! Just seeing and hearing your lover’s voice strengthens the bond between the two of you.
Digital nomad sexy time
When you are across the globe you can’s have sexy time with your partner, so you need to keep up the sexual tension in other ways. Sexting and other enticing messages are great to keep the flames between you. If you like, you can also take it one step further, using the technology.
Gifts are important
Don’t forget to send gifts to your lover. Even if you are miles apart, receiving a hand written letter or a simple gift, such as a bracelet or fluffy toy, will show your partner you’re still thinking of him/her. There is no need to wait for a special occasion to send a gift, so forget about waiting for Valentine’s and buy a scarf and send it to your lover right now, just because you love him or her. This is what makes a long distance relationship sparke.
A small gift which was sent with love can become really valuable, reminding you about your significant other. Being able to hug the teddy bear which slept with your digital nomad lover couple of weeks ago is very important, as it’s a powerful sign of how strong your love is.
Know when your partner is not available to chat
When you are trying to make remote relationships work you have to trust your partner and know his or her schedule. This will avoid embarrassing situations, such as texting like crazy and being worried because of the lack of reply, when your lover is simply at work, in a meeting, unable to chat. These situations will make you anxious and trigger unnecessarily emotions, as lacking control over a strange, potentially dangerous situation is frightening. As a digital nomad you will be changing timezones pretty often, so let your partner know where you are and what’s your schedule and ask him to do the same.
Another important detail: share the significant events in your life with your partner. A promotion, an exam or any other important event needs to be shared, just like you would do if you were living together.
Establish couple goals
Couple goals can become a wonderful game to make remote relationships work. All you have to do is establish a common goal and work for it. It can be anything, even something stupid, like listening to five minutes of rock music each day; as long as it’s something you do together, it will help you bond.
Thanks to the technologies, you can do a lot of things together, so take advantage of this! Take a walk together during a video call, watch something online together, play a game together, read together and so on… there are millions of things you can do at the same time. Even cooking!
This is a creative way to share normal experiences together, even if you are apart.
Don’t forget you also have a life on your own
Don’t forget to spend some time alone or with your friends and people close to you. Not all things are shared with your lover, so get your own piece of “time with the girls/boys”. Go out with your family, share a cup of coffee with your friends and go to the gym on your own. There are many things which don’t involve your lover – don’t skip them!
At the end of the day, the most important thing is to be honest with your partner, as this is the base of a healthy, strong relationship. If you are worried about something, say it; if you are jealous, let your lover know; whatever you feel, you must share it with your partner. When you are in a couple, you support each other. If you keep a good connection, when you will finally visit your lover or he/she visits you, there will be sparkles, glitters and fireworks all over the place!